Saturday, January 10, 2009

«Caturday: Xenu Funny iLOL»

In order to understand this first one, you'd have to know that John Travolta's son recently died. You'd also have to know that John Travolta is a Scientologist; and you'd have to know a little about Scientology. Bad taste? Perhaps, but I couldn't resist.

Where is your Xenu now?
That's not funny


  1. Hilariously bad taste there Marf.

  2. What is their take on death anyway???

  3. @ Monique: They believe in something similar to an immortal soul (thetan). In fact, they believe these thetans to be god-like in power. These thetans then roam the world in search of a newborn to reattach to. In a sense, a re-birth.

    These thetans remember all the traumatic events they've experienced in previous host bodies, over trillions of years. Some of these negative feelings rub off onto the host, and so they are the reason for all the suffering in the world. Of course, the most traumatic thing they remember was being tortured under the rule of the Evil Lord Xenu.

    It was Xenu himself that ordered for these thetans to be brought to Earth and dumped into the volcanoes of Hawaii. Thetans started out as alien souls before.

    They believe that if you go through an auditing process (costing lots of $$$) you can strip these bad experiences from your body thetans and allow yourself to tap into some of their god-like power.

    Basically, the higher-ranking members believe they have super-human powers. John Travolta is a high-ranking member, so I wounder why he didn't use his powers to save his son?

    Oh, and they believe psychiatrists and non-scientology doctors are agents of Lord Xenu, trying to stop them from gaining these powers.

    Now the "church" of Scientology will probably try to sue me for revealing their cult secret. That's how they do things.

    And if you're a Scientologist reading this, and have never heard this story, you're not a high enough OC level to be told yet. I believe they tell you when you reach OC3. If you are OC3 or higher, you're not allowed to talk about it anyway.

  4. Oh snap, you revealed their secret! Nice knowing you buddy :P

  5. @ Trevor: Well, there's so many places you can find this info on the internet now... I took the risk in the name of Freedom of Speech.

  6. Scientology is a total scam! Hey scientologists! Come get me you freakin idiots! ...I'm over here ( points to blog link and gesticulates with two fingers in general direction of all scientologists.)

  7. @ Bunc: Hey, you just made me realize I forgot my "scam" label on that post. Adding it now...


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